My body held the pain of every Kosciusko brumby I’d met
My eyes were seeking something. There was nothing to find
Emptiness stretched
Waterholes long gone
Steel gates
Foul water
Tight chutes
Acrid smells
Wooden rails, too high
Insides freeze
Spirits now shards
I don’t fold
Hard voices
I move to avoid
Cattle crush that crushes
Forced hands that push
I keep myself inside
Iron brands that mark me yours
Two legs and two eyes always on
Never beside
I keep my unborn foal
Ripped from my mountain herd
Shuttled
Terror strung up inside
No where to land
Blocked
I keep closed
Whips to drive me
Voices to fail me
Ropes to pull me over
Treats to bribe me
All exits gone
I am here
But I am not yours
Not available
I make myself
Not available
A lady watched me one day
Rope dragging from my neck
Through dirt and broken families
Through tangled fur, urine and stinking manure
Hard against my pot belly
With foal tucked deep
Through the detritus of being captive
You see me
Four rails
Four walls
Four months
I am captive
My essence held down tight
I make myself
Not available
And it was that lady
That I come to now
For 18 months she has
Watched me
Moved me
Met me
Left me
Waited with me
Given heart and hearth
Given something
I didn’t understand
Today I watched her
I met her
I asked her
I waited on her
I gave her something I do understand
Felt particles
In the
Touch I freely sought
Our insides met
One little moment of each other
My eyes freely open
Inviting
I take her in
Thank you lady
I seek what’s here in this moment
Every direction is available
I show you one day